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First Times

He forewarned me

about the eccentric landlord

who, for unspecified reasons

had permanently locked the front door

leaving a cantankerous sash window

to be the only way in or out.

A new experience, indeed!

Later, he made toast 

and asked me if I liked marmite.

I’d never heard of marmite

and so I misheard ‘marmalade’.

He asked me if  I liked it 

spread thick or thin.

Of course I said thick.

A new experience, for sure!

Later we three went to the Grand Hotel 

for afternoon tea. 

It was very grand

with waiters dressed up

like penguins.

Very strange

but there’s a first time for everything!

And a last.